Fake Men You'd Like To Bone For Real

Burt Farlander - Away We Go

Oh, Burt! You are so very adorable! It isn't just that you bear a striking resemblance to my love John Krasinski, though that helps, but it's also your sweet nature I find attractive. You are a man who is truly excited to be a father, one who is keen to better himself and do whatever it takes to make your partner happy. It doesn't hurt that you aren't afraid to go, ahem, downtown. If you were a real dude, Burt Farlander, I would steal you away so quickly that it would make your twee beard spin. I think you're precious. - Pinky

Hump Day List: Some Men That We Would Do Just Really Filthy Things To

Pinky and The Ladies of Hot Ink

Perhaps you had gleaned this little factoid from my bio on the contributor page, but I really like John Krasinski. A LOT. I have a difficult time watching episodes of The Office where people are mean to Jim, because Krasinski's sad face just breaks my insane little heart.

I have had a crush on Krasinski ever since I watched my first episode of The Office, which happened to be "Christmas Party". I immediately set about watching more episodes and bought all of the seasons until recently.

I don't want to talk about it. Ahem.

I would likely follow that man wherever he wanted me to go. You know, in a purely Freebie List, hypothetical, actually-I'm-totally-serious way. Is it his sense of humor? Yes. That body? Holy Godtopussy, YES. He is sexy. So sexy to me. I would do just wonderful, terrible things with that man. He is my number one (and sometimes number five) on my Freebie List. Always.

But what about some of the other Ladies here? Who really melts their panties?