Natural Glow? Fo' Sho'

Author: Park

I have skin that could be generously described as “pasty”. Perhaps less generously as as white as the ghost of a fish’s belly (I’m pale y’all). I also live in Canada which means that at least half of the year my skin sees less light then a Paris Hilton single (ba-da-bum). Therefore, I like to occasionally trick the world into thinking that I have a healthy glow. 

To torture a metaphor: if I were Batman, Jergen’s Natural Glow would be my grappling hook. Simple, elegant, always gets the job done. Jergen’s leaves my skin silky smooth and with a healthy glow. And unlike some other products on the market will not turn me a Courtney Stodden-orange. Did I just mention Batman and Courtney Stodden in the same paragraph? Why yes, yes I did.

My one complaint about Natural Glow is that it smells weird. Not terrible, but mildly unpleasant. The smell dissipates, but I would recommend applying a while before you leave the house. If you do have to run out the door, make sure to rub the cream in really well or it you look pretty sparkly. Though, I suppose if you’re attempting to convince people you’re an emo vampire then that’s a good look. However, if you are trying to convince folks of your emo vampirism you’re probably trying to remain pale anyways, so forget I said anything

I give this product 7 out of 8 tentacles. It goes on smooth and I like what it does for my skin. I also once had a really hot guy comment on how soft my arms were when I had it on. That alone pushed it up from 6.5. My only complaint is the unpleasant smell. However, if your nose isn’t as freakishly sensitive as mine you probably won’t mind it at all. All in all an excellent product, especially if you live in a country so cold that you often have to fight polar bears for the last of the self tanner*

I'm the one on the left. The sexier one.

*I may have made that up

Rating: 7/8 tentacles