Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Happy July Fourth! Let' Celebrate With Ogling!

Ah, July Fourth. The day when we celebrate independence with exploding things, booze, and lots of red meat. If you're a celebrity, you might also celebrate with a trip to the beach or an extravagant backyard bash. Let's see some celebrity patriotism!

So Katy Perry loves America, you guys. She loves it so much that she drapes the symbol of the country across her magnificent boobs and uses it to cover her bajingo. AMERICA!

Ke$ha is kind enough to show us what Old Glory would look like if it did lines of coke off a stripper's ass and then tried to drink more whiskey in 10 minutes than Motley Crue did in the 80s.

I dub thee pimptriotic. Asshole.

To me, America means coochie cutters.

"Hey guys, I'm super-patriotic! Country music, a bustier suggesting the American flag, and blue jeans! YEE-HAW!"

Listen, Halle. You have fucked up some movies something awful since Monster's Ball. As with many of those movies, even your magnificent mammaries cannot save this threadbare flag dress.

"Stop calling! I can't hear you over the tacky!"

It's Patriotic Barbie, hookin' for America!

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