Thursday, December 15, 2011

Pinky Reads InStyle Magazine: January 2012

Pinky McLadybits


I don't know if anyone reads these magazine recaps, but any feedback you could give me in the comments or our Facebook page or our Twitter (@hotinkreviews) would be appreciated.

Jennifer Garner and her excessively hidden baby bump are on the cover of this month's InStyle. The cover also screams at us about 2012 IS YOUR YEAR! JUST BE MORE FUN. GET FLAWLESS SKIN. REWORK YOUR WARDROBE. Yikes.

I should point out that this issue is really thin compared to all other issues. Who knows how many overpriced candles we'll get in such a tiny tome? But we will soldier on and pray that inside we find at least three candles priced over $40 and something leather and ugly. 

Nicki Minaj has an OPI line of polished with names like Super Bass Shatter and Pink Friday. I want the one called Save Me, with the rainbow glitter.
Dior has nail polish too! $23 a bottle! I will assume that this means it comes with a personal nail tech to apply it.

Grape is going to be very Big in the new year, according to InStyle. The color is nice, but convincing me to wear it is going to be tough when you use this picture to sway me:

Oh, Godtopussy, the upcoming trends are:
  • pastel (time to pull out old bridesmaid dresses!)
  • WICKER PURSES (the bees! the bees!)
  • pleated skirts (I'll allow it)
  • bare midriff (fuck)
  • hourglass silhouette (ON IT)
  • pencil heels (my ankle snapped just looking at pictures)

Visit instyle.com/deals to get discounts on some of the items from their Deals & Steals pages. Do you need a $94 leather passport holder? YOU ARE IN LUCK.

Victoria Beckham is the subject of Her 10 Best Ever. I think Victoria is the bee's knees and my favorite look for her?

Smiling.

Question: What can I do with my hair when it's misbehaving and I don't have time to wash or style it?
InStyle's answer:
Ladies, Mary-Kate Olsen is never the answer. Ever.

Final tally of overpriced candles: 0!
Ugly leather things: 0!

Ugh, you really let me down here. It was an overall boring and less than rage-inducing issue. Do better next month, won't you, InStyle?

2 comments:

  1. I like the magazine reads and thank you for taking one for the team. I can't make it through all that vapidity and rampant consumerism, but I appreciate that you do so that I won't have to. And, in a hypocritical turn of events, I really want the Nicki Minaj OPI polishes. What can I say, I'm a nail polish whore.

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  2. Victoria Beckham looks like she's grimacing in that photo. Eek.

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