Monday, January 14, 2013

Joico Leave-In Detangler: Happy Happy Joy Joy?

Metric Jenn





Hey all, it's Metric Jenn here, once again! Now, I'm not going to lie...this review sat up in my brain, brewing away because I wasn't sure how to properly convey how this product works, not to mention how I felt about it. And so the image that you see of darling Ren & Stimpy may be a a macguffin...OR IS IT?

YOU MUST READ TO FIND OUT...after the jump!
Joico is a more expensive product line than regular grocery store/pharmacy/Wal-Mart fare; and yet I found this leave-in detangler in Shopper's Drug Mart for a whopping 21.99$. AND OF COURSE I BOUGHT IT, BECAUSE IT'S WHO I AM.
Ok, ok, on to the good stuff: It certainly does what it's supposed to, which is to detangle. It also smoothes out *some* of the grossness of split ends. ...and that is all I have to say about that.

Ohhhhh, but I do have more to say. The bad stuff, if you will, is a-comin'. I'm just getting my typing-rage fingers all limbered up.

OH-EM-EFFING-GEE this product is just so awful. It smells like a hospital, but with a bunch of elderly person urine stench mixed in; and may Jebus help you if you spray too much on, it's like a damn ice skating rink on your head. Not greasy, per se. Just slippery. Weirdly, weirdly slippery. And to pay over 20$ for this crap? It was a definite kick to my vagina by The Man. Now, I know you can get it cheaper online at amazon.com and drugstore.com, but even then it's not worth it. Spend that cash on something equally useful, like a belly-button cleaner, or buying 200 crickets to let go in the wild where they will surely die within 20 minutes of release. Especially since it's winter...whatever...I'm tired and I think the detangler may have caused brain damage. So...another reason to hate it.

Verdict? This detangler is a bloated sack of protoplasm. I'm only giving this product a 2 out of 8 tentacles of terror.

Rating: 2/8 tentacles

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