White Chocolate Candy Corn M&Ms: I Wouldn't Touch These With a Ten-and-a-Half Foot Pole

Dixie

When Mars made the first batch of an edible food-like substance that tastes like another edible food-like substance, the universe in the immediate vicinity of the factory ate itself, then sent an apology note to Michael Pollan for allowing food production to reach this point. Unfortunately for my taste buds, a few bags of the new White Chocolate Candy Corn M&Ms escaped the clutches of the Elder Gods in the screaming void of nothingness and landed in my shopping cart. 

Tom Hanks is The Man

MelBivDevoe

Image via Uproxx

I know I've said in the past that Bill Murray tops my list of celebrities I want to meet, but quickly climbing that list is Tom Hanks.  A fan ran into him at a pizza place and Hanks obliged him with a series of hilarious photos.  Don't you think it'd be a blast to just hang out and shoot the sh*t with Hanks?  I bet he's got some great stories.  (Uproxx)

The Smashing Pumpkins just announced they'll be touring this fall.  Did I accidentally wake up in 1997?  Oh, wait, it's not the whole original lineup, just Billy Corgan.  Pass.  (AV Club)