Jones Zilch Vanilla Bean Soda: No Calories,

Author: Pinky McLadybits

I went into my local Old Navy today because I was at the mall and they were having a sale. Old Navy clothes are one of my weaknesses. How I made it out of there with nothing for myself but this soda and just one thing for my daughter, I'll never understand. Am I growing up? Ew.

Anyway, Old Navy is all rearranged and sparkly new from the way it was when I last was in this store. They had drinks, snacks, activity books for kids, and other impulse buy items strewn about the roped-off checkout line. Bastards. That's where I grabbed my Jones Zilch Vanilla Bean Soda, because I was thirsty and it was zero calories.

I haven't had a Jones Soda in a very long time, but I have always liked their flavors and the pure cane sugar they use as sweetener. They're just expensive ($1.50 for this 12 ounce bottle) and aren't readily available in many locations if you want a particular flavor. When I saw the Jones Soda cooler, I decided to take advantage.

After paying for my purchases, I wandered out into the mall and unscrewed the Soda's cap, hoping it wouldn't  slide from my hand and bust on the ground. That would be awful. And it didn't happen. The lid came off easily and I took my first taste. HOLY BANANAS AND CATS AND OTHER THINGS. It was so good. It was like being punched in the mouth by a fist made of a vanilla bean cupcake and frosting. There was no disgusting aftertaste I associate with most zero calorie drinks. It was just lovely and smooth.

Unfortunately, the first pull gave me the strongest blast of vanilla bean flavor that I was going to get. The rest of the drink was barely vanilla, though the lack of aftertaste persisted to the last drop. I have to say, I wouldn't want to drink this every day, or even every week, but it would be a nice treat every once in a while.

Rating: 5/8 tentacles